Thursday, January 24, 2008

I am who I am

I am who I am.

I prefer to stick my head in the sand rather than face it (whatever "it" may be).

I didn't grow up in a church.

I procrastinate.

I am not a naturally driven super-achiever.

I like to cook.

I like staying home with the kids.

This is who I am. I am who I am.

I am also married. To a man that doesn't get along with my mother (now, I know I'm not the only one in the world with this problem). I am being forced lately to choose sides. As a wife to a man who loves me and does not in any way abuse me and a mother to three children I must choose my husband and my immediate nuclear family.

The fact that I am a different person from my mother means that we see the same things in different ways. Our personalities and our life experiences influence our perceptions.

I am who I am. I'm pretty happy where I'm at. Sure, I'd love to see more of my mother and let the kids get to know her better but can't choose the currently proposed situation at the expense of my marriage. What we've got works for us. But not for everyone. Which is really too bad. Be careful what you wish for because it might just open up a can of worms you'd really rather not have around. It sounded good initially in theory but I'm not sure I want to live in no-mans'-land between husband and mother. Perhaps the wrong choice. Maybe I'm supposed to fight the good fight and make it work.

But

I am who I am. So I don't know that I can.

1 comment:

mapiprincesa! said...

You are who you are and I love you for that.

You will do what you have to do. I think you already know that answer. You have seen me through this same situation and the errors I have made; learn from my mistakes.

I am here whenever you need it. You know that. I'm sure you're feeling kind of trapped now. But I am here no matter what.